Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Things That Make Ya Go Blah....and Ahhh.

Okay..certain shit just pisses me off. Here are the top 5 things:

Strangers leaving "spam" at my doorstep. Landscapers, pizza places, tree trimmers. They actually rubber band this crap to my doorknob...or they leave it laying on the welcome mat. I don't read it..I take it to the recycle bin and toss it. I need to ditch that mat!

Tree-trimmers, landscapers, or roofers knocking on my door to see if I need their services. I never answer the door..ever. I talk thru the door and say.."do you know what the home invasion rate is in this neighborhood? One of the damned news reporters on Channel 3 was tied up one day and robbed in this area. I'll call you..don't come by. I had one guy reply, "fuck you bitch". Nice. I also had a couple show up to sell us security alarms..even though we already have Brinks. The guy looked like a Mormon missionary...and the girl was a buxom light-skinned black chick..very pretty. He goes into this crap about how they just want us to put their sign in our yard...blah, blah, blah. Then he gives me this crime map of the neighborhood.

I notice that the word "Christian" is on his shirt. I keep looking at it. I finally ask, are you Jehovah's Witnesses? He looks shocked, "no, why?" I reply, " Well, it is Sat. morning and they usually come around at this time. I thought maybe you were changing the strategy. No more Sunday best clothes with briefcases...in favor of polo shirts with clipboards? You do have Christian on your polo shirt." He says, "that is my name!" I suggest, in our neighborhood, he change his shirt. "We have lots of Satan lovers and agnostics here. That is not a good look for this area." He says, "you are kidding, right?" Nope. They leave. I see them walking around the neighborhood an hour later..and he has changed his shirt! Ha!

I hate it when I am in a parking lot and some "homeless person" comes up to me asking for bucks for their kids surgery. I always tell them to contact their local mental health center where they will be directed to funds for that kind of thing...and I give them the address. I know these things.

{the one time I did give money was when a woman and her daughter asked me for money for breakfast. I asked her if she knew where they serve breakfast in Sac for the homeless moms..and she knew. I also asked her if she knew where a single mom could get shelter. She knew..and she was on the waiting list. She just said it was a long bus ride from Elk Grove and it was a scary place for her very darling 3 year-old..to go to Loaves and Fishes. I had to agree..as I worked with homeless folks for years. I gave her 20 bucks..and then I sat in my car and watched her take that child into Mimi's for food. The look in that child's eyes about killed me}.

I hate when that asshole Dan Lungren leaves automatic messages on my phone. I'd never vote for him and how did he get my phone number?!

My dear husband, and he is, is a registered republican. Poor thing. He is also in favor of gay rights. I am working on him...he is a good man. I hate when we get fricken mail from right-wing assholes telling us how gays will destroy this country. Geez.

Okay..I had one fabulous lunch at Plan B at the corner of Greenhaven and Pocket..my neighborhood. I've been meaning to go there for months. I finally made it. Let me just say that it was "Waterboy" kind of food. Two old ladies came in after me. One ordered the Caesar Salad..which I had ordered also. I got wonderful anchovies from France on my salad...delicious croutons made from Acme bread. Fab. I hear one old lady say, "what is this thing on my salad?" The owners wife comes over and explains that they are whole anchovies. The ignorant woman says, "Ick, I don't want that on my Ceasar, and please leave off the Parm cheese as well" Hello?? That pisses me off..when someone does not appreciate a great Ceasar salad!

I also ordered the most wondorous Nantaise Mussels..with butter, shallots, and cream fresh..Yes, cream fresh (English). Oh Lordie! Oh Crapola! Tender, luscious, perfect. Lucas, from France, said he'd been making that dish since he was 10. The Chef there is a graduate of the CIA in New York. Their pommes allumettes with herb de provence was delightful...french fries with herbs. As good as Bouchan in Yountville and Las Vegas! I also had a bowl of their Fennel and Potato soup...perfect. The old woman across from me asks, "where are the potatoes?" Hey granny, can you say "puree".

I suggested to the owner, his wife, and the chef that the move to a location filled with patrons who would appreciate their offerings. Apparently, they are doing just that..and fairly soon.

Go to Plan B, before June 29th. Next time we are going for dinner..and ordering the Rack of Lamb..which I hear is too good to be true. I am sorry they are leaving my neighborhood..but I get it. This place made me go, "Ahhhh". Maybe we will go for bruch on Father's Day..the 15th.

What makes you go "blah?"


Hahn at Home said...

People who ring my doorbell.

I'll be posting on that Friday night.

Mike S said...

Don't have much or any of the stuff mentioned up here. Guess that's why I'm so happy living in this cold-assed place, keeps the agravatin' jerks away:)

ps.....fish smell when cooking fish generally arises from not-so-fresh fish, cooking too long, too hot, or having butter far too hot. Keep it fresh, cool, and short. Good, fresh, properly done fish should have little or no fishy smell.