One Foot on the Brake and One on the Gas!

Am I kinda scared about turning 55? Yep. Am I kinda excited about what the future holds in store? Yep...and I really can't drive 55. It puts me to sleep.

Seems like everywhere I turn there are advertisements for wrinkle creams, plastic surgery, pills to make one younger and more energetic, etc. I think Joan Baez looks fabulous...you don't think she's had any work done, do you? Not Joan. Oprah has women on her show who are over 50 and damn..they look fabulous. I can hardly believe it. Ya think any of them have had work done? Have you seen Goldie Hawn lately? No wonder I feel like shit on some days...when I begin to believe "the beauty myth".

I was out to breakfast a few weeks ago and this very young hostess asked me if I wanted to see the "senior menu". I should have told her the last time I was a senior was in 1971...and then I graduated. {That wouldn't have been exactly true}. I was sort of horrified...and I don't laugh at "old people" jokes anymore. I declined the menu and suggested that she wait for people to ask for one. If someone is gray or purple haired, has a walker..or walks slowly, smells like roses or old spice..well, then it's a safe bet they are indeed seniors. See? I stereotype as well!

I looked up the definition of senior citizen on two websites. One said, age 62+ and one said 65+. Why did AARP start sending me membership info. as soon as I turned 50?

I do look forward to traveling more, to taking risks, to getting down and comfortable with this journey into "adulthood"....again. I think I'll take up painting, or photography..or maybe I'll take a class or two at Sac City College, just for the hell of it...maybe I'll do it all, and maybe I'll just think about it. I need to make more friends..spend more time with women. I'm not too old to make new friends..but damn, I gotta get out of the house to do it. :0

I don't know if I'm a homebody..or just scared. That's a new feeling for me. I never used to be scared. I guess I feel more scared than I ever have. Hell, I used to be fearless. I started college at the age of 33, got my masters degree at the age of 41. In 1997..ten years ago, I sold everything I owned and moved to Santa Rosa, CA. I can't imagine doing something like that now. Maybe estrogen gives one courage!

Happy Birthday to me (oh, and to Elvis).